I am repentant about my role in relational matters preceding these HBC actions, and I have not failed to express it.
As a pastor who loved his congregation, the people of the church I pastored have been my focus. The majority of my written repentances (some dating back to more than a month before I was terminated) are not more broadly known because until now, I have believed it best to attempt resolution directly through HBC Elders and Staff. It has been difficult to hear stories circulated of my non-repentance in matters I rightly own, vs. false accusations for which I cannot repent (such as the financial allegations, which will be thoroughly refuted in part two).
Not once did I hear HBC say I was not repentant from February – April 2019. Then, when HBC cancelled the April 2019 settlement agreement, I began to reach out to staff who were told not to meet with or talk to me. During a risky May 2019 ‘by permission only’ meeting with Steve Stewart, former WITW CFO, and Eddie Hoagland, I read portions of some of the repentance statements that had been in various Elders’ hands as early January 12, 2019, but were never brought to the full Elder board, nor shared with the congregation. Eddie and Steve then asked for a copy and arranged to read a version to the CLT (lead staff). Only after that reading did the “James is not repentant” theme emerge. It became their new talking point, to refute any objection to the growing awareness that false things were being said and done. I did seek meetings with staff and Elders, and have sought them consistently, in hopes of the best possible resolution. Yet those texts and emails were turned into ‘evidence’ that I was not repentant. However, allowing your teaching ministry to be destroyed and its donor funds unlawfully seized is not a fruit of repentance.
With the Lord’s help, I have tried to continue living the message of ‘Love2Live2Love’, which I preached throughout my final year in the Harvest pulpit. In order to “let brotherly love continue” (Hebrews 13:1), I have attempted to absorb HBC’s eleven public statements in 2019, each more vicious and shaming of me. At the same time, I repeatedly communicated my repentance as a beginning for mutual humility between myself and HBC leaders. I did this with no significant response to date, in hopes of closure and, as God allows, healing for all.