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Friends Who Hold You Up

David saw that Saul had come out to seek his life. David was in the wilderness of Ziph at Horesh. And Jonathan, Saul’s son, rose and went to David at Horesh, and strengthened his hand in God. And he said to him, “Do not fear, for the hand of Saul my father shall not find you. You shall be king over Israel, and I shall be next to you. Saul my father also knows this.” And the two of them made a covenant before the Lord. David remained at Horesh, and Jonathan went home (1 Samuel 23:15–18, esv).

Because of the pressures of life—stress at work, turmoil at home, a health problem, a financial crisis—sometimes we stumble. Sometimes the weight on us is so heavy that we can’t help but stumble.

That’s when we need a biblical friend or two to hold us up, as Jonathan did for David during a crisis in his life.

David was being hunted again by King Saul. This wasn’t a game; Saul wanted to kill David. “And Jonathan, Saul’s son, rose and went to David at Horesh” (1 Samuel 23:16a). Jonathan was taking his life into his hands by even speaking to his friend, who was number one on Saul’s most wanted list. As we examine this scene, let’s notice five ways Jonathan held David up. These translate into five ways we can support our friends and receive their support.

1. Their Presence
A biblical friend shows up. Jonathan arose “and went to David” (23:16a). Jonathan had many reasons for staying away. Personally, he had everything to lose and nothing to gain. He risked his father’s wrath. In fact, when he got up to leave the table in the palace, his father threw his spear at him, trying to kill his own son (1 Samuel 20:30–33), which showed how Saul had slipped into insanity. In siding with David, Jonathan also risked his own royal position. After all, if Jonathan just let his dad kill David, then Jonathan would become the next king.

But David was alone and afraid, and there was no way Jonathan was going to let David down. He went to David.

2. Their Prayers
A biblical friend prays with you. When Jonathan arrived at David’s hideout, he “strengthened his hand in God” (23:16b). Even though David was a man of deep faith—author of most of the Psalms, a man after God’s own heart, a giant-slayer—he was hurting and disillusioned. Jonathan didn’t show up with shallow comments or advice, nor did he present himself as the solution. He helped David take his problems to God.

Notice what Jonathan didn’t say. No cheap encouragement, like, “Dad will come around soon, Dave,” or “Don’t worry so much. It’s not as bad as it seems. Let’s look on the bright side while you hide here in this damp, dark forest without food or hope.” Often when we show up for our friends who are hurting, there’s nothing to say. The burden is too big, the hurt too deep. It’s about presence and prayer. We need friends who will take us to God, and we need to be that kind of friend when others stumble. Christian friendship isn’t about sitting in the same pew at church on the weekend. We need friends who will get on their knees, pray, and discuss the things of God with us. Biblical friends “spur one another on toward love and good deeds” (Hebrews 10:24b, niv).

3. Their Protection
A biblical friend protects you. As soon as Jonathan showed up, he reassured David, “Do not fear, for the hand of Saul my father shall not find you” (23:17a, esv). Think of what these words meant to David. David was an emotional guy—he’d have to be to write the kind of moving poetry found in the book of Psalms. It’s not hard to imagine that as he saw Jonathan approaching, David might have questioned his friend’s loyalty. He didn’t have to wonder long. Apparently Jonathan sensed that David’s meter was redlining, so he quickly reassured him. “My dad won’t find you. Of course I won’t tell him where you are. Relax.” When David heard those words of support, he felt strengthened.

When our hearts feel like tornadoes, the last thing we need is for a so-called friend to show up and fan the storm. Instead, biblical friends protect us, speaking words to soothe our troubled emotional state.

4. Their Personal Loyalty
Biblical friends confirm their personal loyalty. Jonathan told David, “You shall be king over Israel, and I shall be next to you” (23:17b). Even though Jonathan was the prince, David had been anointed to be the next king, and Jonathan didn’t contest God’s decision. In fact, he painted a picture of the future for David, essentially saying, “You will be king—not me—and that won’t sever our relationship. I’m content with being number two as long as you’re number one.” No wonder David loved him.

When we stumble, we need friends who protect us with their fierce allegiance, not someone who turns against us and kicks us while we’re down. We need friends who will come to our aid and lift us up with their life-giving loyalty.

5. Their Promise
A biblical friend confirms the friendship with a promise. “And the two of them made a covenant before the Lord” (23:18a). Some men might balk at that idea, claiming it sounds girly or weak. Actually, what a sign of strength that two warriors stood together, admitting they couldn’t be all that God wanted them to be without the other. They communicated, “I really need you! Let’s stand together in this.” That kind of committed friendship lifts those who stumble.

When we slow down in life, get off track, feel discouraged, lose focus, want to quit, or fall flat, we need this kind of friend.

And we need to be this kind of friend.

Journal

• Consider these five ways a biblical friend holds you up in support. Do you have a friend like that? If not, ask God for this kind of friendship.
• Are you that kind of friend? Do you show up for, pray with, protect, show loyalty to, and pledge your commitment to your friend?

Pray
Father God, thank You for the strong bond between friends, like Jonathan and David. I need that kind of friend in life. Please help me to recognize and value a friend who will hold me up when I stumble, and if I don’t have that, please help me to build that kind of strong, biblical friendship with another Christ-follower. A true friend is a gift. Please help me to be that kind of friend. In the name of Your Son, Jesus, I pray, amen.

The Warrior Mindset

Since therefore Christ suffered in the flesh, arm yourselves with the same way of thinking, for whoever has suffered in the flesh has ceased from sin, so as to live for the rest of the time in the flesh no longer for human passions but for the will of God (1 Peter 4:1–2, ESV).

Suffering will come. “Indeed, all who desire to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted” (2 Timothy 3:12). All will be persecuted? Yes, all.

Because God loves us, He warns us that pain is coming so we aren’t blindsided by it. If you’re driving down the freeway, a car cuts in front of you, and you see a collision coming, you brace yourself. If you stumble down a flight of stairs, you instinctively throw out your hands to break the fall. God’s Word repeatedly, lovingly warns us that suffering is God’s number one tool for chiseling our character so that we have realistic expectations and can brace ourselves for what’s to come.

Since suffering is coming (or for some of us, is already here), we also need to know what to do, and God’s Word gives us practical advice. It begins with the right mind-set. “Since therefore Christ suffered in the flesh, arm yourselves with the same way of thinking” (1 Peter 4:1). How did Jesus think like this? From the moment His ministry began, He knew where it would end. At the right time, He turned His face to Jerusalem, knowing exactly what awaited Him there. He chose the cross. He willed Himself to be our sacrifice.

We need to arm ourselves with the same mentality. Rather than scratching our heads, wondering why we’re going through hard times, we should be thinking, I’m one of God’s children, so I’m not surprised by suffering. God has this planned for me, so I’m staying under it. With God, I’m going to get through this.

Along with these realistic expectations, we also need to guard our behavior. Often when we’re going through difficult times, we are more vulnerable to sin. We stand at a crossroads and either get bitter or get better. Either we move forward/upward, or we drift backward/downward. Trials present a watershed moment.

During a time of real hardship, you become a target. Peter warns, “Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour” (1 Peter 5:8b). Satan sees God’s children going through hardship, and he’s waiting for an opportune time to pounce. What God allows for your good, Satan wants to twist into evil. Sin that hasn’t tempted you for a long time can crush you during a trial, when all your energy and resources are directed toward surviving. That’s when Satan rushes you. You can find yourself falling into patterns you thought were gone forever. An unsuspecting person might lament, I thought I’d never touch that bottle again, but here it is, empty. Satan wants to shame you and make you think you haven’t made any progress at all. But as a blood-bought son or daughter of the living God, you were chosen for something better!

Arm yourself for the onslaught. Guard your behavior “so as to live for the rest of the time in the flesh no longer for human passions but for the will of God” (4:2). We only have a few more years, if that. We’re in a free fall. Life is short, fleeting, like a vapor—gone. God forgive us for the months and years we’ve spent with our pleasure at the top of our agenda. What a shallow existence! Instead of pursuing personal passions, go hard after the will of God in your life. It’s not the hardship but your response to it that really matters.

Though temptation to sin can sometimes be heightened in trials, suffering can also make you more focused in your walk with Christ. Pain in one area can sensitize you to other parts of your life. Suffering teaches you in new ways that life isn’t a series of random, unrelated events; it’s all connected. As you formulate urgent prayer requests, you examine your life for anything that would prevent you from being heard. You might ask, “God, what do You see in my life that needs to be dealt with? Anything I need to get right with You about? Have I been ignoring You about something?” You get the mind-set of a warrior, not wanting to carry anything extra into the battle. “Share in suffering as a good soldier of Christ Jesus” (2 Timothy 2:3). Arm yourself like a warrior.

Journal

• For many of us, our default is not a warrior mentality. What’s your natural response to suffering?
• “It’s not the hardship but your response to it that really matters.” What trial are you facing now? Are you getting bitter or better? Are you falling prey to old sin patterns, or are you more focused in your walk with Jesus?

Pray
Lord Almighty, You are a Warrior, and You call me to be a soldier too. Thank You for the warning that suffering is coming. Why do I expect life to be smooth? You never promise it will be. I want to arm myself with Jesus’ way of thinking—accepting realistic expectations, guarding my behavior, and drawing closer to You during the trial so You can use it to refine me and to bring glory to Your Son, Jesus, in whose name I pray, amen.

Vertical Living | Love Gone Wrong: [04]

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You cannot live – really live – until you love God. Love to live! And you cannot really love God unless that shows up in your loving of one another. God has given each of us the capacity to love. Vertical love is God before me. Horizontal love is you before me. But as with anything, the enemy has something else in mind.

Satan can’t create anything – he just takes the beautiful things that God has created – twists them and attempts to use them to destroy us. One such twisting is taking a love for God & others and converting it to “legalism.” Maybe you have been the recipient of a pointed finger or found yourself with the “three pointed back at you.”

In Vertical Living, God will take you to the mat with the full weight of all that He is. Watch and learn how to LOVE2LIVE2LOVE.

Love Gone Wrong
1 John 2:15-17

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Vertical Living | Intro: Part 3

WATCH

You cannot live – really live – until you love God. Love to live! And you cannot really love God unless that shows up in your loving of one another. Loving other people adds logs on the fire of personal revival and personal love for God.

In fact, the two are so closely interrelated that God is not interested in our expressions of love when we have hatred in our hearts toward another person – especially another one of His children, and most especially those of God’s family who are hardest of all to love. There are things about the Lord you will not comprehend until you are growing in love.

In Vertical Living, God will take you to the mat with the full weight of all that He is. Watch and learn how to LOVE2LIVE2LOVE.

Vertical Living | Intro: Part 3
Matthew 22:37-40

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Vertical Living | Intro: Part 2

WATCH

You cannot live – really live – until you love God. Love to live!

And you cannot really love God unless that shows up in your loving of others. In fact, the two are so closely interrelated that God is not interested in our expressions of love when we have hatred in our hearts toward another person – especially another one of His children, and most especially those of God’s family who are hardest of all to love. In Vertical Living, God will take you to the mat with the full weight of all that He is.

Watch and learn how to LOVE2LIVE2LOVE.

Vertical Living | Intro: Part 2
Matthew 22:37-40

In the Trenches

TODAY’S DEVOTIONAL

Then Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. And after fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. And the tempter came (Matthew 4:1–3a, esv).

Faith is as practical as you can get. It’s not ivory tower, abstract, feel-good thinking. Faith is for real life in the trenches. Let’s look together at the life of Jesus and see how Christ Himself used faith at the point of temptation to gain victory.

Some people argue that as God, Jesus couldn’t experience true temptation to sin. False. The Bible teaches that Jesus was severely tempted. Hebrews 4:15 reassures us that Jesus gets it: “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin.” When facing temptation, Jesus didn’t use His divine powers to say no. Within the confines of His humanity, He was victorious by faith. In fact, using His deity is exactly what Satan was tempting Him to do, but Jesus refused. “And the tempter came and said to him, ‘If you are the Son of God, command these stones to become loaves of bread’” (Matthew 4:3). Satan appealed to Jesus’ hunger, since He hadn’t eaten for forty days, and tempted Him to prove Himself, but Jesus said no: “Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God” (4:4). Jesus exercised faith in the Word of God to repel the attacks of the evil one.

“Have faith in the promises of God’s Word.”

Think how vulnerable Jesus was. He had been fasting in the wilderness for forty days and forty nights. Undoubtedly he felt hungry, tired, and lonely. In His humanity, He was facing off against Satan.

Satan crafted three, appealing temptations: turn stones into bread, throw Yourself down from the temple, and receive the kingdoms of the world from me if You worship me. Upon inspection, that last temptation appears to be a weak one, yet in it lies a lesson for us: In the heat of temptation, the offer may appear attractive, but when you stand back from it, you can see how ridiculous it is. In desperation to ruin Jesus’ perfect, sinless track record, Satan offered Jesus everything He had made and already owns. In His humanity, Jesus was susceptible to that temptation, yet He saw through the façade and realized it was not a part of His Father’s plan.

As each temptation presented itself, Jesus used only one weapon to fight it: faith in the Word of God.

Temptation #1: “Command these stones to become loaves of bread,” said Satan (Matthew 4:3).
Jesus said no and quoted Deuteronomy 8:3: “Man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord.”

Temptation #2: “Throw yourself down,” suggested the evil one (Matthew 4:6).
Jesus said no and quoted Deuteronomy 6:16: “You shall not put the Lord your God to the test.”

Temptation #3: “Fall down and worship me,” Satan invited (Matthew 4:9).
Jesus said no and quoted Deuteronomy 6:13: “It is the Lord your God you shall fear. Him you shall serve and by his name you shall swear.”

Three temptations. Three biblical answers. A perfect example of the power of faith in God’s Word.

Notice that this isn’t faith in faith, that cultic, deceptive message of faith in the power of faith itself. The Bible doesn’t teach that there’s any power in what you say simply because you say it with confidence. That would be blind faith. The power of faith is in the object of our faith: God’s Word. If what we say is from God’s Word, and in the depth of our being we believe it, then we will find incredible power. Like Jesus, we can have faith in the promises of God’s Word.

Journal

• Why is it comforting to know that Jesus was tempted just as we are?
• What are some common temptations you face? Think of some verses from God’s Word that address those temptations, and arm yourself.

Pray
Father God, thank You that Your Son knows the full human experience. Jesus gets it. He knows what it’s like to be human and to face temptation—yet He never sinned. I’m in awe of Him. And I want to be like Him and to face off against the enemy of my soul armed with faith in the powerful Word of God. I want to store “up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you” (Psalm 119:11). Make me more like Jesus, I ask, and it’s in His name I pray, amen.

Vertical Living | Intro Part One

WATCH

You cannot live – really live – until you love God. Love to live! And you cannot really love God unless that shows up in your loving of others.

In fact, the two are so closely interrelated that God is not interested in our expressions of love when we have hatred in our hearts toward another person – especially another one of His children, and most especially those of God’s family who are hardest of all to love.

In Vertical Living, God will take you to the mat with the full weight of all that He is… watch and learn how to LOVE2LIVE2LOVE.

Vertical Living | Introduction Part 1
Matthew 22:37-40

Conquering Insecurity Part 1

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Conquering Insecurity Part 1
Exodus 4

God has a plan for every person – He wants to work for you, in you, and through you. But when God calls us to live out our purpose, we often encounter paralyzing insecurity… the awareness of the gap between who we want to be and who we actually are.

This week in Exodus 4, we return to Moses’ story, as God calls him to boldly follow. Though filled with flaws and failures, God teaches Moses (and us!) an important message about how to truly conquer that insecurity.

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What Brings the Glory Down, Part 4 – Unafraid Witness by God’s People

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What Brings the Glory Down, Part 4 – Unafraid Witness by God’s People
2 Corinthians 2:14-17

What Brings the Glory Down, Part 3 – Unceasing Prayer from God’s People

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What Brings the Glory Down, Part 3 – Unceasing Prayer from God’s People
Jeremiah 33:3

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